A Dad's Thoughts - the war waged against college men, does it matter?

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Okay I’ll admit it, there are times when I question if the things that we’re doing to stop the war being waged against college male students really matters. Does the regular and ongoing updating of our website matter to anyone? Does the daily social media work of tweeting on Twitter and posting on Facebook move anyone to action? Do the emails, telephone calls and face-to-face meeting with legislators or their staff really have an impact? Does anyone even notice the work being done?

But then I receive a phone call or email from a desperate parent pleading for help and the memories and emotions immediately start flooding back. I start to recall the shock, the bewilderment, the despair, the disbelief, the frustration, the anger, the fear, the isolation… and I can hear it and feel it in the voice of the person that I’m talking to. I’m not fighting on behalf of our young men and their families because it’s the popular thing to do, I’m doing it because it’s the right thing to do AND because I’ve been there and know first-hand how unbelievable horrific this nightmare is.

When I read or hear the stories of how an innocent young man has had his life turned upside down because of a false accusation of rape, I want to scream. Like many others, I ask “how can an injustice like this happen in a nation as great as the United States?”

There are no adequate words to express how deep the pain goes nor how traumatic the injury to mind and spirit are. Nor can one fully appreciate how damaging it is to walk around with the stigma of being branded a rapist by your university until you’ve walked in those shoes. It is largely for this reason that we founded The Sojourner, an online forum for students and families dealing with the devestation of a false accusation.

The Sojourner is a discussion community developed for college students or their immediate families that are dealing with the emotional affects resulting from being falsely accused of sexual assault. The aftermath often leads to anger, anxiety, depression, confusion, isolation, etc. This discussion group is a private forum to provide a venue for those who wish to discuss their experience and will hopefully help in the healing process.

We want you to know that you are not alone. The Sojourner is designed to be a safe harbor to express yourself. However, be forewarned that we will not tolerate and will remove obscenity, personal attacks or any other malicious postings.

If you wish to become a member of this group, please follow this link: https://groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/thesojourner/info

Stay healthy, stay safe and stay strong.

Dad out.

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